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Phresh Pheed

Residents Of Vault 88 – Subject 6/16 – Schwanhild

 

For those who believe in the concept of “sin”, look away. The Casino is next. A colorful place with just as colorful characters.

This guy popped up before I could even get myself a beer.

Meet Schwanhild. A man.

Name: Schwanhild
Occupation: Casino host / Entertainer

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Schwanhild: Hello! I hear yoo were interjewing peeple.

RR: Hi there! Your accent is a great place to start. I take it you’re not born in the vault?

Schwanhild: I am in fact given birth in ze volt. I vas even raized in dis wunderbar volt. I Studied a Bavarian book ven I vas a kinder and like lightning from ze sky I became Schwanhild, ze entertainer.

RR: Interesting name. Why did you pick a feminine variant?

Schwanhild: VAT?! It is not feminist. I havf positif proof it is a manly name. It means battle zwan. Very manly.

RR: Okay, I believe you. So, what does a Bavarian do in a vault?

Schwanhild: I run dis clazzy casino and entertain by swallowing zordz and zerving drinks on fire.

RR: Sounds dangerous.

Schwanhild: No, I am a zkilled pro, so nothing ever happenz. Here, let me show yoo. My biggest zord. Maybe I zhood zoak it in fodka and ignite it. Ach ja, wunderbar idea. Zank yoo!

RR: No, please, don’t do that. I believe you. I won’t have any part in this. Thank you. Bye!

 

I figured it would be smart to get as far away as possible from the future accident. On to the next “interjew”.


Click here for the previous article in the series, before the interviews.

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